LIFE HAS VALLEY'S

Whenever we are in a valley we can trust that God is there; waiting. He allows us to stay awhile; but not too long. 


What God has for us may be hard to grasp, so He waits.


God uses life experiences to mold us; to shape us into the vessel He created us to be.  

God uses life experiences we go through to help others.

Are we willing to do what God has called us to do?

In the valley is fear and struggles to work out. 

These are some I have had to bring to God from out of my valley's.

Did I miss His calling?
Did I damage the vessel?
Did I love, enough?
Is it too late?

And God's answer is no, it is not too late. I will help you with your calling; I will repair your vessel, and I will show you how to love more.

Whatever your valley looks like, God is waiting and He will always be faithful to bring your through.

I Corn. 1:9 "God is faithful, who has called you into fellowship with his Son, Jesus Christ our Lord."

Isaiah 64:8 

"Yet you, Lord, are our Father.

We are the clay, you are the potter;

we are all the work of your hand."

Anger

I've read and believe it to be true that unforgiveness breeds ill health. Just as God gives you forgiveness; you are called to forgive. "Matthew 6:14 "For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you." (NIV)

Do you know that anger within you gives way for the devil to come in? Unforgiveness boils up inside by the means of the devil. As the devil boils your anger it gives way to bitterness; violent temper; gossip and other sinful ways. 

Ephesians 4:27 "and don't give the Devil an opportunity." (HCSB) I read just this morning that the Greek word for opportunity is topos, in English this same term gives us the noun topography meaning territory.

Back up to Ephesians 4:26 "Be angry and do not sin. Don't let the sun go down on your anger." (HCSB) 

If you stay angry at another person, holding back forgiveness, first the Lord will also hold back His forgiveness. Second, you give way for the Devil to have territory or space within your heart and mind.

I don't know about you, but I do not want the Devil to have any territory within me. Borrowing from some unknown quotes: "Keep no list of wrongs" and "Hate the wrong without hating the wrongdoers."

I do hate the wrong that has been done and continues to be done against us in this world. I have found that I can forgive the wrongdoers of this life by realizing God died for the wrongdoer too.

Forgiveness of violent acts will never be easy, you will start and stop;.  Just when you have days where you feel confident in your forgiveness; something brings it back and the pain returns. 

When the pain returns, turn again to God and He will show you the way to begin again with forgiveness.  

David says in Psalm 46:1 "God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble." (NIV) 

Insert your name in this verse, here is how I read mine, "God is Bev's refuge and her strength, He is my ever-present help in my troubles."

Lord, I ask you to speak to your children just now, if anyone is in trouble, be their refuge and strength. Remind them of your forgiveness that they might forgive. In Jesus name, Amen.

The Truth

In my last blog, I told you I have found a place to be content. 

Today I am questioning myself if that is the truth?

Why? You might ask.

This past week and a half; I fell back; where? 

To that place of depression; to that place of missing.

I couldn't or wouldn't go to my content place; I couldn't or wouldn't hear God.

I was however, waiting, waiting?

I applied Frankincense oil over my heart it has the ability to keep me calm and reverent. 

And so, I slept, woke, went to church and work, did the necessary household chores all with a heaviness only God knew I was carrying.

My prayers or pleas to God were short and expressed in my mind only. 

I tried reading my bible, but I was not hearing, not understanding and so I put this one back on the bedside table and my other back in my "to go" bag.

I thought I was past the struggle with depression; I thought I was doing so well. I was handling the moving forward pretty well.

Ha, not so.  In an instant I am afraid of the wind. 

Andrew, Alexander and Tanner are missing, there is no search to be done, there is no new lead. There is no closure. 

Myself and this family I blog about are individually and silently suffering. We have put on a face for all of you.

We are falling apart and the pain is real.

Steve Bridgmon you are right, "I wanna be where you are!" 

When you sing the song, "Where You Are" I am dissolved to tears. Yet, I see Andrew, Alexander and Tanner vividly and they are the same 9, 7 and 5 yr. old boys with the same faces I know from 6 yrs. ago.  They have not changed and I want to be with them.

"We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed." 2 Corinthians 4: 8,9 (NIV)


Thank you Paul for giving me these words today through Lysa Terkeurst.

And then taking me to the Kidron Valley. 

"My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death." Mark 14:34

I hear you Lord, I am not going through anything that you have not already suffered and even more so. I am not going through this alone.

God has said, 

"Never will I leave you; 
So we can say with confidence,

The Lord is my helper; 
I will not be afraid.


I am hard pressed; crushed and in despair; and I am overwhelmed with sorrow; but I am not alone. 


Jesus told Peter to "come" and so Peter got out of the boat, but when the winds came, he was afraid and began to sink. 

But, Christ was there and what he did was no small thing, he stretched out his hand and took Peters and together they got back in the boat.


Tim Crisenberry, I sank too. 


Now I am once again taking Jesus' hand of safety and I am getting back in the boat.

Family Struggles

It is time to begin my blogging again. It has been 2 1/2 yrs. since my last blog. So much has changed about our family.

We live in OH now, in a small country home on less than an acre of land. I have longed for country living for years and so I enjoy this home.

Don and I work part time jobs in hardware stores just to keep active.

We now have 6 adult grandchildren, two married with one child each. One Marine in California and another headed to Paris Island in Sept to join his brother in the Marine Corps. One granddaughter with a boyfriend who has a daughter. (adding a potential 3rd great grand to our family.) One grandson starting his 3rd year at the University of Indianapolis. 

We have a junior, a sophomore, a freshman and an eighth grader this year.

Our greats are a Kindergartner and an almost 3 yr. old already home schooling.

I long for answers to where is Andrew, Alex and Tanner are. Have they kept up in their grades, are they content or do they wonder where is my family? Are they safe? Are they with Jesus? 

Five divorces have taken place within this family and we will see yet another within the year.

But, I have grieved, suffered, let go and forgiven. I have found a place to be content.

I share that I struggle to keep my family gatherings strong. So many families, so many gatherings to attend. How can our families juggle all these gatherings? 

How does the 1st generation of a 4 generation family keep the gatherings together. I have not found a way to gather them together in the same place at the same time. 

It was a joy this past month to have us all together to celebrate our 50 years of marriage.

Sun. dinners, tried and failed; Easter tried and failed; summer gatherings; tried and failed; you see the struggle.

Aw, Christmas now that works as long as long as we alternate the Christmas weekend and the New Year weekend. Oh but wait, we have a NE family who can't make it home; a Marine and soon another miles apart. 

My dear family, please know I love you all, I miss you all everyday. You are near and dear to my heart, you are my joys, my sorrows, my pains and my laughter.

"Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul and with all your strength." Deuteronomy 6:5

Taken from Ephesians 6:
"Wives submit to your husbands as to the Lord." 
"Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her..."
"Honor your father and mother..."

"Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another - all the more as you see the Day approaching." Hebrews 10:25

As I quote these scriptures, I know it is God first and all others second. I know it is the meeting together as Christians we cannot neglect. 

But, I also know for a family to stay strong they must follow all these things first to Honor our Heavenly Father, then to honor father and mother then each other.

Denying Self and Taking Up My Cross

God has my attention this morning, but it all began yesterday, His day of rest, my day of worship and praise.

In Sunday School we discussed how do we deny self and live daily for Christ.

Luke 9: 23-25 "Then he said to them all: 'if anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will save it. What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, and yet lose or forfeit his very self?'"

In worship we were asked to fill in a chart of what we did every half hour the day before. Looking the at how we spent our time and then listing what is important to us.  How did our day reflect what is important?

To change our life we must change our perspective, change our priorities.

Psalm 39: 4,5 "Show me, O Lord, my life's end and the number of my days; let me know how fleeting is my life. You have made my days a mere handbreadth; the span of my years is as nothing before you. Each man's life is but a breath."

My husband Don and I then attended at Quiz Meet our churches team was participating in.  We witnessed teens from area churches answer questions on the Old Testament life of the Israelites and Moses leading them out of Egypt.

On to the Mark 209 concert our own Living Hope Free Methodist church hosted. The church was within moments filled with the presence of the Holy Spirit.  Lives were changed last night. I was challenged and reminded of my commitment to stand up and speak out for Christ. 

Mark 20:24 "However, I consider my life worth nothing to me, if only I may finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me - the task of testifying to the gospel of God's grace.

This morning I am seeking God for what is important to me. 


“I used to think the spiritual life was mostly about finding and using our gifts for God’s glory–my utmost for His highest. More and more, I think it is not this, not first, not most. At root, the spiritual life consists in choosing the way of littleness. I become less so that Jesus might become greater. Its essence is No–No to myself, my impulses and cravings, my acts of self-promotion and self-vindication, my use of power for its own sake. It calls me to deny myself possessions, rights, conquests that I’m tempted to claim just because I can. It is growing, day by day, into the same attitude that Christ had, and by exactly the same means: emptying myself, giving myself. It is refusing to grasp what I think is owed me and instead embracing what I think is beneath me.” ~ Mark Buchanan, The Rest of God

Today I am on my knees, as I reflect on what God wants me to hear from yesterday's teaching and worship.   I invite you too to join me and get on your knees.

This is my prayer:
Dear Jesus, come into my heart this day, I confess to you any sins I have committed and seek forgiveness.  I seek you to show me the way to deny myself, take up my cross and follow you.  Show me the way to change my life by changing my perspective and my priorities.  Where am  I to share your gospel this day Lord, I am ready to continue the race. 
In Jesus' name, Amen

Freedom of Speech

Freedom of speech - America your law says we have the freedom of speech - and so we do.

Or do we?

If you have followed the many interviews my family has given over the past 2 yrs. 10 mos. 22 days, you know what the producer allowed to be aired as we answered each and every question.

Could you hear what was not allowed to be aired? 

You see in every interview, we spoke of our faith in Jesus Christ to get us through.

Just this week, I have been asked to write a letter to the editor of our local paper.  I am expressing my support for the write-in candidate for Mayor of Morenci.

After submitting the letter, the editor sent back a few questions for me to address.

Rightfully so, after all this is his job, to be sure my position is understood and I am open to any and all rebuttal that will come.    

Next Wed. this city will read of my desire is to have God fearing men and women in government offices.

My dear readers, we as Followers of Christ are not to be still, we are to speak the truth.

It saddens me that our country has gone so far away from God, so far away from what our forefathers believed and founded this country on.

What saddens me more is us, dear followers of Christ, we have been silent, when we should be shouting!

Why have we kept silent so others won't be offended?

I am done being silent. The letter to the editor is a beginning for me. 

Christ was rejected and crucified, I believe He is asking me to speak up and take the rebuttal.

Luke 9:22-27 "And he said, 'The Son of Man must suffer many things and be rejected by the elders, chief priests and teachers of the law, and he must be killed and on the third day be raised to life.'
Then he said to them all: 'If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will save it. What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, and yet lose or forfeit his very self? If anyone is ashamed of me and my words, the Son of Man will be ashamed of him when he comes in his glory and in the glory of the Father and of the holy angels. I tell you the truth, some who are standing here will not taste death before they see the kingdom of God.'"

"I must die first"

Karen Ehman writes devotionals for Proverbs 31, I am drawing from her devotional I read over a year ago.

Looking at I Corinthians 15:31 Paul writes, "...I die every day!

In Romans 12:1 He tells us to present ourselves as a "living sacrifice."

Paul is telling us that as Christians we must die to our self, meaning we put aside what it is we want to do.  We must present ourselves daily to God for Him lead us in what we are to do.

The Message Bible interprets this passage:

"Take your everyday ordinary life - your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life - and place it before God as an offering. 

Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him."

Karen writes that before reacting; before speaking; before passing judgment; before snapping at another; before acting, pause and spiritually say,

"Just a moment, I must die first."   

Do I know what it means to "die first?"

Well, lets take a look at what it means.

For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake, he is the one who will save it." Luke 9.24,25      

How very often I just want to be left alone, sit in the quite, keep the blinds shut and do nothing.  Sometimes picking up a book, watching a movie or doing handiwork.

But, is this what God wants me to do?

We all need rest and I know we are to care for our bodies to promote good health.

But to sit all day doing nothing, I think not.

Getting up between 6-6:30 every weekday, has been so very energizing for me.  I believe this is what God wants. 

Die to self, do not stay up late at night do not sleep in to 9 or 10 a.m.

Start your day, Good morning Lord, what do you have for me today.

For me, walking to my crossing intersection before the students arrive, taking a brisk walk both directions from my corner and talking to God. 

Then I start crossing the students, wow how energizing they are!  I know them, thank you Lord for giving me memory to learn each one by name.

Thank you Lord for knowing me by name!

I need to learn to "die to self" in more areas of my life.

So I blog, never thought I could write and share publically, I can't, so I die to self and trust God.

Never thought I could lead Adult S.S. class, I can't, so I die to self and trust God.

But dying to self is more than doing, it is in every detail of my life.

So, I respond when someone needs me; I love even when it is hard to love, I forgive what I do not want to forgive.

Do you get it my friends?  God came and died for me (for you), Jesus went to the cross, dying to His human self, for me (for you).

Give me a minute why I give in to the tears that fall when I think of Jesus on that cross.  Not because he choose to, but because His Father asked Him to die to self.

I don't know where you are today in your spiritual life.  I don't know who it is you believe in.

What I do know is I step out today, dying to self and asking you - Do you know Jesus?  Have you asked Him into your life?

I invite you to pause if you have not ever before, pray, Dear Jesus, I need to die to self, I need your forgiveness, forgive me and come into my heart today. 

Do you need to renew your sinners prayer, then I invite you to say the same prayer just asking Jesus to renew the forgiveness he offers and to renew the spirit within your heart.

Are you ready to spend eternity in Heaven?  I am, and I want to see or meet you there.

Matthew 16:24 " Then Jesus said to his disciples, 'If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.'"